The Fat Girl's Guide to Living

Try something that looks fun but makes you nervous. We dare you.
(image by Lori Greig)

This summer, I tried something that terrified me. And I loved it.

Something about surrendering my body to a dark, narrow tube, hurtling downward through twists and turns, only to be unceremoniously ejected and swiftly deposited into the chilly water below freaked me out. Go figure. “I’ll stick to the slower slide, thankyouverymuch,” became my mantra. But my desire for comfort made me uncomfortable; what was I modeling to my kids about trying new things, what would the 18-year-old me have done, and was I missing out on something I’d probably find thrilling? Knowing my battle with desire vs. hesitancy, my husband kept nudging me to try it, then the kids joined in (“If I can do it, you can, Mom!”). I climbed the two flights of stairs to the platform, waved to my family far below, then took a deep breath and pushed off into the darkness.

Was it scary? Yep. Was it worth it? Absolutely. I spent the rest of the afternoon hurrying up the stairs to hit that slide again and again. Nobody pointed and laughed at the big mama behaving like a kid; if anything, I think my joy was infectious. Maybe some other women watching were inspired. Or maybe nobody cared at all and my worries over what others might think were unfounded. (Nobody even noticed me surreptitiously correcting my massive, post-splashdown water wedgie.)

The comfort zone for us bigger girls (remaining indoors with the AC blasting, telling ourselves we can’t do certain activities or wear certain things) can start out as a sacred space where firm boundaries are drawn. But as that zone expands, it can also become an overstuffed cushion ready to absorb our every excuse, the well-worn collection of stories we tell ourselves, like “fat girls can’t ride a horse,” stories that hold us back from really living our lives to the fullest. Think back to the last time you successfully pushed beyond your comfort zone (tango lessons? speed dating? aqua aerobics?) and came out the other side perfectly okay. Sure, there may have been missteps or embarrassing moments, but you lived to tell the tale, right? This guide to summer fun offers suggestions for getting out and trying something new, and we encourage you to come back and tell us how your new experiences went – stumbles, triumphs, wedgies, and all.

Hiking–which is essentially walking in a more rugged, natural setting–is a great activity because it can be as easy or as challenging as you decide to make it and it’s a great beginner’s adventure. Our two-part guide to hot weather hiking (Part 1 here and Part 2 here), plus our guide to hiking in challenging conditions like sand dunes or muddy areas are great starting points. I know heat and humidity, combined with the need to expose more skin, can feel like insurmountable hurdles here. Look for plus-sized workout wear, carry plenty of water, expect to sweat (it’s okay; really!) and start small at first if you’re nervous–many city parks offer plenty of green space for beginners to test their trail legs, and plenty of park and recreation districts offer guided hikes geared toward beginners.

Speaking of city parks, I’ve been taking advantage of our sizable park to ride my bike either early in the morning or after dinner, when the sunlight isn’t as unforgiving (either way, I still wear sweatproof sunscreen). Our guide to cycling, mad love for cruiser bikes and tips on finding plus-size padded bike shorts are helpful starting points if you’ve been itching to travel on two wheels but not sure where to start. If you’re worried about deflating the tires on your bike, we’ve tackled this issue, too (you won’t).

If getting on the water is on your life list, our guides to kayaking, canoeing and surfing should prove tempting. Or maybe taking a cruise is more your speed; you can be as chill and comfortable as you wish, or you can embark on new adventures on board (rock climbing walls, dance lessons) or off (rainforest zipline tours, island exploration). Of course, if you’ve read the FGG About page, you know my suggestion will be to opt for at least one adventure. Perhaps being in the water is your goal but you’ve been avoiding swimsuit shopping; you’ll want to consult our guide to figure-flattering swimwear and best places to find a plus-sized sarong to wrap around your suit, and we recently helped a reader with some ideas on attending a poolside bachelorette party in Vegas (we also have some insights into the daunting prospect of socializing in swimwear).

I know we cover a lot of active ground here at FGG, but I also understand that rest and relaxation are an integral part of enjoying the summer season. I suggest striking a balance between stepping outside of your usual routine and rewarding yourself for doing so. Perhaps a girlfriend getaway is in order (you are TOO worth it!), or it’s time to finally find a hammock that feels comfy and supportive while you swing lazily reading some great fiction featuring plus-sized protagonists. Just remember: too much comfort can be as detrimental to mind, body, and spirit as too much stress. Use the rest of these summer days to push yourself a little bit and try something you think would be fun.

We’ve packed a ton of summer fun into this guide, but we’re always eager to hear your suggestions for guides to activities you’ve been longing to try but aren’t sure where to begin – share your “life list” ideas in comments.

image by sopues

We love hearing from our FGG readers. You girls help keep us tuned in to the questions and issues that are real and relevant in your diverse lives right now. This week’s reader question is a great example:

“Hello! I love to go snorkeling, jet skiing, etc., but find my time in the sun causes more than the occasional sunburn. I’d like to get one of those rash guard shirts that offer sun protection, but can’t seem to find one to fit me. I wear a size 20-22 top and I know they’re supposed to be slim fitting, but I end up looking like an over-stuffed sausage! Have you guys had any experience finding any in plus sizes?”

Worn during all types of watersports from surfing to kayaking, or just while swimming, rash guard athletic shirts (so named because they protect the skin while sliding on and off a surfboard) are made of spandex and nylon or polyester. In addition to providing protection from UV rays (shirts are given UPF ratings, similar to the SPF ratings seen on sunscreens), these shirts can be worn snugly over a swimsuit or layered under a wetsuit to minimize skin chafing.

The ideal fit is close against the body without making anyone resemble breakfast meats. Choosing a plus-size rash guard with the correct fit is important because UPF drops as a shirt stretches and the material thins out over your skin. The largest selection of extended sizes comes from Solartex Sun Gear, which offers women’s rash guard shirts in sizes as large as 5XL, which fits 52″-54″ chests. In addition to short-sleeve and long-sleeve shirts, Solartex also sells plus-size, unisex rash guard shorts, tights and loose-fitting swim shirts (up to size 6X), as well as a ladies’ rash guard swimsuit.

For a less pricey alternative (approximately $20 cheaper than the Solartex shirts), consider a short- or long-sleeved Lands’ End AquaTerra™ rash guard if you can comfortably wear sizes 1X-3X (16W/18W – 24W/26W). We like Junonia’s sporty, color-blocked rash guard with a zip-front style, but as of this writing every single size and color combination is on backorder.

Finally, the least expensive rash guard we found was from SunGrubbies.com: The short-sleeve version costs just $29.95 and is available in sizes up to 4X, which claims to provide “skin-tight” fit on women weighing 230-250 pounds, or a looser, “t-shirt fit” that’s comparable to a ladies’ 2X. Our only issue? A 5’2 woman weighing 250 pounds is likely to carry her weight much differently than a 5’11 woman of the same weight. Using weight as a sizing guideline sometimes makes things more confusing when the intent is to be clear.

Rash guards and swim shirts are gaining popularity, especially for their sun protection properties. Are you a fan? Tell us which brand and fit you prefer, and share your experiences about sizing in the comments.

Sarongs spice up a curvy girl’s summer wardrobe (Image by Gummo)

Dear FGG: I love the look of sarongs as bathing suit cover-ups, but they never wrap all the way around my hips, and either one thigh or my whole front is left totally exposed. Am I stuck with “one size fits most” but not me?

I share your pain. “One Size” anything — especially items designed to wrap around the hips, where my body is its fullest — always leave me feeling like I’m trying on doll clothes or shopping in the junior’s section. The good news for full-figured girls with hips, thighs, butts and tummies is that we can absolutely get the comfort and breezy, flirty look of a sarong in sizes that actually fit. All it takes is a bit of savvy shopping.

The sarong (or pareo) is one of the most basic pieces of clothing you’ll encounter; ultimately, it’s just a long, rectangular piece of fabric — that’s it. The creative aspect of the garment comes in both how it’s worn (as a skirt, as a dress, as a cover-up) and how it’s tied. Full-length (to the feet) sarongs are usually about 44″ long, while knee-length skirts stop at about 22″.

As with any plus-sized garment, the key when you’re shopping for a larger sarong is to check the sizing carefully. For example, we found knee-length and ankle-length options at Swimsuits Just For Us, but the widths are 52″ and 56″, respectively, which the site lists as fitting sizes 1X-2X. If your hips are well within those measurements or you don’t mind your skirt being substantially open on the side where it ties (and thus not providing 100% coverage), these options are probably just fine. Other sarongs might be advertised as plus-size but don’t offer width measurements, which makes them risky for larger hips and thighs, as well. If you’re ordering online, make sure you understand and feel comfortable with the return policy when you order in case the garment doesn’t fit.

Because the sarong is so versatile and designed to work with extra fabric, a wider-than-necessary purchase isn’t a terrible thing, so err on the side of extra inches rather than something that’s too small. We like the look of the double-layer sarong pareo wrap skirt from Sabine Silks ($39.99 in sizes that fit up to 6X or 24/26) and the basic colors (and sale prices) of the georgette styles from Sassy Sarongs (66″ wide, from $29.99).

If you’re feeling more of the traditional Polynesian vibe and want something brighter and more floral, options abound at Feedora. Finally, don’t forget to check out our old friend Etsy, home to a number of the most reasonably priced finds in made-to-order dimensions. My favorite was this 70″ x 42″ hand-dyed batik print for only $30 (I’m a sucker for the color combo of chocolate brown and aqua), but you may prefer the same dimensions in orange or purple. — or possibly even this black & white silk ($58.00; 66″ x 26″).

Whichever sarong you choose, this fun and flexible garment that can be worn any way you feel most comfortable and attractive. Have fun experimenting with styling until you find the pattern and tie configuration that’s right for you.

Have a lead on a great source for sarongs that fit or the most fat-girl-flattering tie style ever? Share it with your fellow readers in comments.

Keep your head above water in aqua class (image by The Udall Legacy Bus Tour)

Exercise and I have never been good friends. Like many fat girls I’ve met over the years, my gym class experiences were always a torment, and I gravitated toward friends who were more likely to pass time playing cards or watching 90210 reruns than starting a pick-up game of basketball or soccer. Between the sweat, the beet-red face, and the fact that every movement was a struggle, most workouts I’ve tackled as an adult have been faced with gritted teeth and an eagle eye on the clock’s second hand. So when I skeptically accompanied a new weight-loss friend to her fitness center several years ago, I expected to grind through my guest-pass meetings with both treadmill and trainer before scampering back to the safety of my couch – or at least my Tae-Bo videos and closed blinds.

The minute we walked into Galter Life Center, however, the smell of pool chlorine greeted me like an old friend. As a direct result of my Pavlovian response to water of any kind, I walked out of the gym that day with a membership contract and began working out regularly. But for some reason, I never set foot in the pool – the very thing that sold me on joining — until last Friday. Years after previously abandoning my membership and gaining back the weight I’d lost, I put every fear and excuse aside and joined my best friend in the pool for my first-ever water aerobics class . . . and it was love at first splash.

Good for what ails you

Unlike land-based exercises where you support your entire body weight (and the accompanying impact on your joints) during your workout, water-based workouts provide cardio, strength and flexibility training opportunities without placing the same stress on your body. The resistance of the water actually increases the effectiveness of the workout while cushioning and supporting your body. A 200-pound woman will burn an average of 360 calories during an hour of water aerobics; for a 300-pound woman that number skyrockets to 540 calories. And because you’re surrounded and supported by the water, there’s no way to fall or land awkwardly during a movement.

Best of all, if sweat is one of your workout nemeses, grab a pool noodle and rejoice: You can’t tell that you’re sweating in the pool, and the water provides a cooling effect. It takes almost nothing for me to get red-faced and overheated, but I flipped, kicked and lunged through the entire routine feeling refreshed even though my heart rate was up and my muscles were warm.

Anything but a beauty contest

One of the things I’ve noticed over the years is that many water aerobics participants tend to be older or overweight, likely because of the benefits described above. The obvious upside to such a demographic is that no one really stands out. Our class involved approximately 15 participants of varying ages and sizes. My friend and I were definitely the youngest in the pool, but there was no awkwardness, and everyone was too busy focusing on his or her own balance and technique to spend much time watching others. Another perk: once you’re chest-deep in the water, only the instructor can really see your lower body or movements. Unlike some aerobics or step classes I’ve taken where I’ve felt conspicuous because of my weight – despite being fully clothed – this setup didn’t make me feel self-conscious at all.

Look, ma – I’ve got stamina!

Because I’ve managed to get myself into pretty rotten shape, one of my biggest fears was that I wouldn’t be able to complete a full 60-minute class, much less keep up with the pace and the intensity. Sixty minutes on a treadmill or elliptical would kill me. So imagine my surprise when I still had energy, breath and strength left after 20, 40, 50 minutes of water exercise!

Like traditional land-based aerobics, we never did any one movement long enough for me to burn out. Instead, the instructor (who – bonus! – was a down-to-earth woman of about 30, with a normal figure and no ridiculous cheerleader schtick) led us through a variety of alternating sets from her position on the pool deck. Accompanied by her own mix of cardio jams (pretty decent except for that awful “Mambo No. 5”), we warmed up for 10 minutes with marches, kicks in front, kicks to the corner and travels left and right.

When the workout picked up, Instructor Megan was careful to model and remind us of ways to raise or lower the intensity of our movements with each new action. Almost every movement included a variation that allowed for more limited range of movement. Lessons learned: Jumping jacks are easier in the water. Reversing momentum (beginning to walk backward when you’ve previously been traveling forward) is far more challenging than it looks. “Rocking horse” movements are as baffling as they sound. Your butt and hips don’t jiggle when you run or jump underwater. And moving into deeper water will increase the water resistance, and therefore a movement’s level of difficulty.

What surprised me most was that the cardio portion was a breeze compared to the challenge of working with the aqua barbells, which we received about 35 minutes into the hour. Although arm movements like pushing the water out or down had been incorporated all along, the added resistance of holding down the floaty barbells during the same motions was more than I expected. By the time our 15 minutes of barbell work (which included several movements to target the abs while floating with arms to our sides) was completed, I was ready for the 10-minute cool down and stretch. I left the pool feeling tremendously accomplished and my muscles continued to feel nice and well-used for the next 48 hours.

Dress the part

There’s really no way around the fact that water aerobics = swim-friendly attire, which is what kept me from suiting up until now. My approach to swimming tends to involve as much covering as possible. Swim dresses with skirts. Over-sized t-shirts on top. I haven’t owned a skirt-free suit in 15 years. After listening to me make excuses about how the skirt would float up or my girls would pop out for an unapproved guest appearance, my best friend wisely told me to shut up and try on one of her higher-necked, skirt-less suits from Longitude. (I hate it when she’s right.)

The no-frills one-piece I wore to the pool covered my butt and boobs completely, while allowing full range of motion. Best of all, I actually think it was more flattering on me than any of the skirted looks I’ve sported in the past several years. The straps were wide and the neck was high, which is a must if you’re large-chested; you want to be able to focus on your movements and breathing, not about whether you’re over-exposing yourself. If one-piece suits aren’t your thing, a tankini that stays put and allows movement would work well, also. I threw a pair of swim shorts over my tank, but probably would omit them next time, because they bunched up between my legs during the cycling and cross-country skiing motions. Above all, wear what makes you comfortable, confident and able to move freely. And if you’ve got long hair, secure it in a ponytail or pigtails so you’re not messing with it during the workout. (Note: At no point were we asked to put our heads under water.)

Be sweet to your feet

Water may be forgiving on joints and muscles, but you still need to be conscious of your form. Try to avoid spending the whole class standing and landing on the balls of your feet. Not only will using  your whole foot work your muscles more effectively and prevent injury, it’s also less likely to cause calluses and blisters. To minimize irritation from repeated contact with pool tiles and grates, consider purchasing aqua socks; for better stability, upgrade to water shoes.

Don’t be afraid to shop around

Like any type of workout, one size doesn’t always fit all. Most gyms will offer multiple aqua fitness classes to suit different levels of ability and intensity. Some classes focus more on cardio, others on strength conditioning or stretching. Believe it or not, the class I jumped into was a high-intensity class (hello, ego boost!) that the center calls Aqua Blast. (Consider this a road-tested late addition to our Guide to Unleashing Your Inner Superhero!) Several gyms have hopped onto the current Zumba craze and offer Aqua Zumba, water aerobics with a Latin dance flavor.

Whatever class you choose, remember that you control your own tempo and pace. If a movement demonstrated by the instructor is too “big,” you can always adjust to something that feels more comfortable, or just kick your legs or march in place until the next move.

Going rogue

If the local gyms don’t fit your needs, comfort level or checkbook (I’m still turning over couch cushions for change to fund a membership), there may still be a way to get your water aerobics fix. Girls lucky enough to have a pool of their own (or a friend who will share) can create a water routine using imagination and/or resources like DVDs, aqua barbells or weights from retailers such as WaterWorkOut. The same can be done in a community pool or, during the summer, in a lake or other local body of water. Everyday household items like empty milk jugs can be used in place of barbells, or you could just grab a $3 pool noodle and start kicking. Even walking laps during open swim at your local YMCA/YWCA will provide cardio and strength benefits.

As for me, I’m wishing I hadn’t wasted so much time psyching myself out of an activity that feels like such a natural fit for a water-loving girl. Don’t follow in my ‘fraidy cat footsteps, ladies — dip your toe into an activity that you’ve previously only wondered about. It might turn out to be the fitness “aha moment” you’ve been waiting for.

What do you love about water aerobics? Have you wanted to try but held back? Or waded in then decided it wasn’t for you? Tell us in comments.

This week’s Fat Girl’s Guide is the first installment of a two-part series. Part I takes you through all your cruise prep – from research to wardrobe. Next week’s Guide will be crammed with ways to make the most of your onboard experience.

A few things are certain on a cruise: Drinks will be ridiculously expensive. By Day 3, you’ll begin to recognize other passengers and to make up nicknames and stories for them (“Needs-to-Lay-Off-the-Spray-Tan Lady,” “Guy with Giant Smurf Tattoo”). If your name is “Angela,” you will be “The Girl Who Over-Packed” and you will never live it down.

You’ll notice one assumption conspicuously absent from that list of guarantees: Everyone will be thin, sporty and cover-model gorgeous.

If anyone has ever told you that fat people don’t cruise, I’m here to tell you they’re wrong. The truth is, unless you’re taking a specialty voyage geared toward a particular audience (singles, families, LGBT community, under-30, BBW, etc.), your fellow travelers will represent all different shapes, sizes, ages, backgrounds and activity levels. Cruising while fat is the same as tackling any other opportunity — you just need a game plan. And maybe some Dramamine.

Determine your travel style.

The options are almost limitless when it comes to voyage length, destination, ship amenities and formality level, so a savvy girl and her traveling companion(s) need to set a few basic priorities before booking. Will you spend most of your time on the ship, or do you plan to see the sights at each port? What amenities are the most important to you? Fabulous spa? Tons of pools? Luxurious bedding? Unique on-board activities like bowling or a climbing wall? Do you want lots of kid-friendly activities or a more relaxed, adult pace? Lengthier cruises tend to attract more seasoned travelers and retirees, while voyages during school breaks will be loaded with kids. Compile a list of must-haves (spa!), negotiables (bedding), and deal-breakers (tons of kids if you’re looking for a singles experience) and see if you can find a cruise line and voyage that meets your needs.

Your dining experience requires more planning than you think.

We know fat girls sometimes feel more confident in casual wear vs. formal (or vice versa), so it’s important to know your comfort level before committing to a particular ship. Do you love the idea of getting dressed up in the evening, chatting with new friends and having a set dinner time? You’ll probably be a fan of more traditional cruises, offered by many lines (Carnival is one example). Although a number of lines have begun offering flexible dinner times or a 24-hour cafeteria on some ships, the traditional cruise dinner experience matches you with a set group of dining companions at a fixed time throughout your voyage. Dress codes are more formal as well, and some may require cocktail attire.

On the other hand, if you’re not a fan of chatting up new people, or if you enjoy a more casual experience and a higher level of flexibility, you’re definitely a candidate for “freestyle” cruising. Employed most notably by Norwegian, but gaining traction on other lines, freestyle is just what it sounds like — freedom to choose where and when you eat, and with whom you share meals. During our nine days aboard the Norwegian Jewel, my friends and I dined in eight different restaurants at times ranging from 5:30-10:30 p.m. With the exception of the Japanese steakhouse, we never shared tables with other passengers. Shorts, jeans and tank tops are off-limits everywhere but the buffet, but basic, casual cruise wear (check with your line for their rules on casual and formal dress) was appropriate for all other restaurants.

Veteran tip: Even if you cruise freestyle, be prepared to do some on-board planning. Reservations (made up to 24 hours in advance) are usually required at non-buffet restaurants, while a few of the boutique dining options (steak house, hibachi, Asian cuisine) required a $10-$20 cover charge.

Once you’ve set your priorities, dig in to researching, purchasing and planning.

Put time and thought into planning your cruise vacation. If you’ve heard good things about a particular cruise line, or spotted a great bargain, explore every inch of the web site, including the FAQ and virtual tours of staterooms, dining rooms and amenities. Many lines will offer basic info in the sections for first-time cruisers and some sites also offer a community area to network with other passengers.

For feedback beyond the colorful marketing pictures and exciting descriptions, turn to independent web sites like Cruise Diva, which offers summaries and reviews of each cruise line’s concept, in addition to the individual ships in its fleet. Cruise Critic and CruiseMates each provide news and reviews, as well as bustling online communities that are phenomenal resources. Comb through discussion threads by cruise line or topic (Cruise Critic is even searchable), or create a user account and post your own questions. Many of the message boardies are hardcore — having traveled on a dozen or more cruises — so their insights are usually pretty helpful. You also may be surprised to see how many of the questions pertain to weight issues or fears about size.

Veteran tip: Cruise lines take care of their online communities. On a recent  NCL sailing, members of an active message board group attended an exclusive on-board party and were invited to tour the ship’s bridge and rub elbows with the captain.

Read the fine print before booking excursions.

Both the cruise line’s web site and the independent message boards provide a wealth of information regarding excursions offered at every port. Again, corporate descriptions will be glossier, while you’ll get more of the down-and-dirty scoop from fellow travelers. Whether deciding on a cruise-sponsored excursion (higher costs but more accountability to you as the customer) or seeking an independent tour guide or vendor in a port city (lower costs, smaller group sizes, more customer responsibility to vet thoroughly), be sure you understand everything about the activities. Some excursions (zip lines, ATV travel, helicopter tours, some smaller boats or kayaks) will have clearly outlined weight limits of 200 lbs, 250 lbs, 400 pounds per 2-person boat, etc. Many tours and excursions will outline the exertion level involved or provide a list of activities a participant must be able to accomplish (climbing stairs, walking a mile, walking on uneven terrain, climbing into and out of boat, etc.). Again, many travelers on message boards will have done these activities and can give you honest feedback. If you feel nervous or unsure about any portion of a description, never hesitate to contact the cruise line or the vendor.

While there are definitely some activities off-limits to larger travelers (I doubt I’ll ever be welcome on a zip line!), it’s important to realize the vast majority of the options are things most of us can do. There wasn’t a  remotely skinny person in our Caribbean travel group, yet we snorkeled, climbed catamaran ladders, swam with dolphins, hiked down to view a volcano, rode tenders out to play with stingrays, and toured an island on an 18-person bus that resembled a clown car. Be honest with yourself about your limitations, but don’t let worries over your size keep you from trying something new.

Pack a few different swimwear pieces.

The two-suit rule is a gimme; no one likes climbing into a wet swimsuit, and sardine-can staterooms don’t afford great options for ventilated drying. Aside from doubling up, however,  you may want to consider multiple styles of swimwear (like a skirted option and a one-piece, even if you’re vehemently pro-skirt) or top & bottom separates that you can mix and match, especially once you determine which excursions you’ll be taking. Dressing for a tour of Mayan ruins or a day at the beach is pretty easy, but several of the tropical excursions involve multiple components that require you to be clothed one minute (in a local restaurant, for example) and ready for swimming the next. For these swim/land hybrid excursions, don’t wear a swim dress with a built-in skirt if you hope to put a pair of shorts or pants over it for the land portion. Few things are as uncomfortable as trudging around for several hours with a soaking-wet mass of fabric balled up at your waist (the skirt part on many swim dresses takes forever to dry). I MacGuyvered this problem when I encountered it by gathering the skirt at one side with an elastic hair band, but believe me, it was not my finest hour.

Look for quick-drying, versatile, over-the-suit options, like these multipurpose shorts from Junonia, available in sizes up to 4X. We also like the selection of swim shorts and activewear from lines such as Lands End, Danskin or Faded Glory. And even if you’re not leaving the ship, remember to pack a cover-up, sarong or pair of swim shorts for the lengthy trips between your stateroom and the pool.

Veteran tip: Plan your excursion outfits to be useful regardless of activity order. Our day in St. Lucia was described chronologically as land/lunch/swim/sail, but we learned that half the groups go in reverse order to manage crowding with the tour vendors.

Supportive, broken-in shoes or sandals are a must.

Whether you plan to disembark at every port or just chill on the ship, prepare to do a good amount of walking. Cruise ships are enormous floating civilizations, and the distance you’ll cover just traveling between your room and the various locations onboard will surprise you. Additionally, some excursions may involve wet conditions, walking over varied terrain, climbing up or down stairs, etc. I’ve never been able to walk comfortably in flip-flops; they don’t stay on my feet and they provide zero support. If you’re like me, consider sandals from Chaco or Teva, which offer good tread while providing ventilation and supportive ankle straps. There’s also the Crocs option. Yes, they are as fugly as shoes come, but – love ‘em or hate ‘em – they were a godsend for the port days when our itinerary involved a sloshy catamaran ride, stops to swim and snorkel, hiking down into a volcano, and a bus tour of the island – all in a single outfit. Crocs were easy to clean when sandy or dirty, they went from wet to dry conditions without problem, and I didn’t care if I ruined or lost them.

Veteran tip: Get a rush of accomplishment by wearing a pedometer to track all those steps you’ll take during your cruise. Plus, you’ll know without a doubt you’ve earned that trip to the midnight chocoholic buffet!

Come back next Thursday for Part II — all about selecting/maximizing your stateroom, on-board accommodations and (of course) the food! In the meantime: Been cruisin’? Tell us your packing must-haves or share tips for finding a fat girl-friendly ship and excursions that excite.

Designer Monif Clarke knows a thing or two about dressing up our curves

Dear FGG,

HELP! I always have a hard time finding tops and dresses to fit my large chest. By the time I actually find something that fits me on top, I’m swimming in it on the bottom. I’m desperate for tips on what styles to wear!

I learned the hard way that dressing my pear-shaped bod in baggy, straight tops made me look like this, so it took some trial and error to find clothes that flattered my body type. But even on my biggest, non-pregnant days, I maybe make it  into a C cup, so I turned to an expert to help us answer this question: Monif Clarke, CEO and Designer at Manhattan-based Monif C. Plus Sizes

FGG: What are some common fashion mistakes you see large-chested women make?

MC: I am large-chested myself and I think the biggest mistake we make is not wearing the right size bra. Sometimes women come into my plus size boutique in New York, and when I take a look at their bra that they got for $20 at their local mall, I tell them it’s so important to invest the money to go to a bra shop, get fitted, and buy the right size bra. [FGG here: I've had great luck with Nordstrom for personalized bra fittings]

FGG: How important is a good bra, and can you suggest any brands to our readers?

MC: A good bra is very important because it will improve posture, make your clothes look nicer, and help alleviate the additional weight from our large chests. I don’t have any particular brands I love, but I do shop quite a bit at bravissimo.com. [FGG here: Readers, if you have any faves, we want to hear from you in the comments on this one!]

FGG: What should busty girls look for in tops and dresses that will fit and flatter their curves?

MC: I think that we look great in wrap tops and dresses, and V-necks are universally flattering. Often when women are large-chested, the chest pushes out the dress/top, which can make her look like she has no waist or hips. I think it’s important to look for dresses with empire waists and wraps to highlight your waist. Also, short jackets with curved seams are great to pull in our figure at the waist.

FGG: Do any fashion lines – from budget buys at Wal Mart to high-end couture – really “get it” in terms of fitting bigger breasted women?

MC: As a large chested woman, I’ve never really felt too limited to stick to particular brands for clothes. I think rather you want to look at an entire line of clothing and figure out what pieces you can pick out of the line to highlight your curves. For example, when I shop, I usually look for fitted dresses or fitted tops to wear with A-line skirts. I try to minimize volume on the top half of my body and concentrate it in the lower part of my body to avoid looking bigger on top.

FGG: Anything else you’d like to add?

MC: There are more options than ever for large-chested women to find bras that are pretty and supportive, and many more options for clothes out there, but we have to be willing to seek out these options. When designing clothes for Monif C. Plus Sizes, I always make it a point to pay attention to necklines as well as things like the width of shoulder straps on a dress, so I can know it can universally work for all women. We recently expanded our product line and are now designing plus size swimwear for sizes 14 – 24. One of the main features of the swim suits are halter neck ties, which work especially well for large-chested women because they help to “hoist” up the girls in the swimsuits.

Thanks for your insights, Monif, and for creating such vibrant, fun, and fashionable clothing in our size! Readers, we know we’ll be hearing from you on this topic because you always seem to know the best places to find fashion that actually fits our figures. Share your favorite finds and tips in the comments.

Into the Ocean, by Cat804

Join Our Photo Challenge!

Beginning this month, we’ll be hosting a contest each month for winners of our weekly photos. We’ll post our weekly photo challenge, and if you accept, you’ll add your photo to our FGG Girls Flickr group. Each week, Tee and I will select a photo-of-the-week, and then at the end of each month, we’ll draw a prize winner from those. October’s prize: an awesome book thong of your choice from Lonna’s Book Bangles (an Etsy shop). These as cute as they are practical, and Tee and I use them to feed our reading addictions.

Last week, Tee asked readers to share an image that evokes the end of summer. And while nobody has answered the call (sob!), we plucked this image by from the FGG Girls Flickr Group because the soft light gives it a vintage feel while also nicely evoking the waning days of summer.

There’s still time to join our photo challenge! We’re making the theme a monthly challenge – and starting with this week, it’s all about fall in October. There are so many directions you can go with this theme: raking leaves (or jumping into a big pile of them), lining up pumpkins or Halloween luminaria, or self portraits of you looking adorable in cozy jackets, boots, and knee high socks. If you’re camera shy and/or would like to see examples or hear suggestions, ask us in the comments section.