Gulf Coast, 2006: The day we built a playground with KaBOOM!

I was racking my brain Wednesday night for a way to kick off this week’s Guide (okay, truthfully I was watching “American Idol” at my friend’s house), when the show’s annual philanthropy-fest, “Idol Gives Back,” aired a piece that outlined the important work done by Feeding America. “I would love to work for Feeding America,” my friend said wistfully, “but I’d feel too weird about being a fat girl working for a hunger relief organization.” And just like that, this intro wrote itself.

Volunteering: The great equalizer

Here we are on Earth Day, smack dab in the middle of National Volunteer Week — what better time to tackle the perceived notion that fat girls are somehow lazy and inactive? The amazing plus-sized beauties in my world lead rich, diverse lives that include: horseback riding, travel, tennis, gardening, motherhood, yoga, cycling, softball and — for some — healthy doses of community involvement. Yet for some of us, it’s tougher to overcome the internalization of the notion that we “can’t” do something because of our weight. Maybe it’s because many of us equate volunteering with food pantries and soup kitchens, and anything involving food feels like it draws attention to us. Or maybe it’s because we fear not being able to keep up with the energy levels of those we’d be joining in whatever effort we chose. Martin Luther King once said:

Everybody can be great, because everybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve. . . . You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love.

Granted, Dr. King didn’t include “You don’t have to have a BMI lower than 25 to serve,” but his point is clear: Service is the great equalizer. Rich, poor, young, old, Ph.D. or high school dropout, fat or thin — it doesn’t matter who you are. It only matters that you want to lend a hand. And ladies, there are 10 times as many ways to pitch in as there are those of you reading these words right now.

Beyond food banks

It’s difficult to pinpoint how food became the default association when we think of volunteerism; perhaps it’s because hunger is such a universal issue. Or maybe it’s because, for those new to community service, spending a few hours packing food boxes or serving hot meals offers an easy, single-day way to get involved. Regardless, if you’re looking to avoid any perceived stigma (your own or otherwise) about being a fat girl working with food, don’t worry — there are scores of other ways to pitch in.

Our recent Guide to Spring Cleaning Your Closet mentioned donating your ill-fitting clothes to charitable organizations, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Opportunities to make a difference exist all around you — at your child’s school, through your church or as part of neighborhood clean-and-green efforts. If you’re not sure where to begin, try searching VolunteerMatch or Serve.gov, online databases of volunteer openings that are as easy to use as plugging in your zip code and area of interest. Idealist.org lets you be even more specific in searching its 18,000+ opportunities by selecting specific issue areas or skills used. Another great option to investigate is HandsOn Network, which includes 250 Action Centers in 16 countries. From big city organizations like Chicago Cares, New York Cares and Hands On Atlanta to smaller community hubs like Volunteer Center of Johnson County (Kansas) and HandsOn Bay Area (California), these centers are your local volunteer experts and can help connect you with a meaningful project that addresses critical need in your own community.

Find your volunteering niche

Because there are literally thousands of charities and volunteer opportunities out there, this is one of the few areas in life where you can essentially write your own ticket. So pick a cause that’s near and dear to your heart. Local animal shelters and adoption centers can almost always use volunteers to maintain the facilities and to walk, socialize and care for the animals. Various services for veterans rely heavily on volunteer assistance, and many youth organizations are starved for volunteers to staff their educational and recreational programs. Or you could pair good deeds with a current health or fitness goal and raise money while walking or running. Many 5K or 10K events also include a walking option; some are even geared toward families. Find an event near you by searching the Runner’s World database (look for walk/run combos).

If you’re looking for an activity that doesn’t require a lot of mobility or physical exertion, consider donating blood — zero exertion and free cookies! If you’re a knitter, take on a few projects that will benefit homeless or underprivileged kids or adults. Not crazy about needles of either kind? Become a trained domestic violence hotline volunteer, provide some companionship or a game of Bingo at the local senior center, or become involved as an ESL volunteer or youth tutor. In addition, nearly every nonprofit organization, large or small, welcomes willing, enthusiastic volunteers who can provide administrative or reception support. Your professional skills may come in handy, as well; try scanning the “get involved” or “support” pages for organizations you respect to locate their wish lists, which will often include services like PR, marketing, graphic design or accounting. Basically, if you have the time, an organization will gratefully find a way to use it.

Fight the “fat girls can’t…” notion

One of the scariest and most fulfilling experiences of my life took place in October 2006 in Biloxi, MS. A year after Hurricane Katrina ravaged the gulf coast, I finally had the time and money to spend a week participating in the rebuilding efforts. Having convinced a friend to join me, we made arrangements with Hands On Gulf Coast (now Hands On Mississippi), booked our flights, and spent a week eating communal meals and sleeping in bunk beds, dorm-style, surrounded by dozens of other volunteers.

Anyone who knows me will tell you that I don’t take naturally to physical activity and hard labor; I’m an indoor, creature comforts kind of girl, and I’ll choose the escalator over the stairs every single time. So the idea of spending my vacation willingly rising at dawn and working until my feet ached and my muscles screamed was a huge step outside my comfort zone. I had several moments leading up to the trip where I thought, “Oh my God, I’m not going to be able to do this. I’m too overweight and out of shape. People will laugh at me. It’s going to be too hard.” But I’d spent the whole year wishing I could do something to help, and thankfully, that conviction overshadowed the massive doubts I was having.

The days were long and the work was hard. We spent two work days working on the community gardens maintained by HOGC, hauling fence portions and bags of Quikrete, digging post holes, hanging and setting fencing, painting the fence. Another day was spent raising a playground from the ground up with KaBOOM! (see photo, above). When we arrived on site that morning, there was an empty lot behind the school and a ton of supplies, tools and play equipment components; when we left that afternoon, 200 people from all over the county had created a full-scale playground for the kids to enjoy. I worked alongside the school’s principal atop a 10-foot-tall pile of playground mulch. I pitchforked mulch until my arms felt like they would rip off in protest. It was one of the most fulfilling days of  my life. That trip taught me that my weight may make some things more challenging (I’ve never popped so much Aleve), but it doesn’t define me unless I let it.

Celebrate the benefits of giving back

You don’t have to hop a plane to the nearest disaster zone or become Queen of the Mulch Pile to prove that fat girls can do anything they want to do. All you need is the willingness to step outside of your daily routine for a few hours here and there. Volunteer by trying something new or doing what you do best. Either way, the boost of accomplishment and confidence is one we could all use. Plus, if you’re shy about meeting people, community service is a terrific way to ease into a new network of friends with similar interests and passions. There’s even been research done to suggest that volunteering makes us healthier. The only question left is: How will you choose to get involved?

How do you stay involved in your community? Has your weight ever held you back? Tell us in comments. Similar Posts:

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• Ask FGG: “How do I take the focus off my weight during a job interview?”
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Open call for Biggest Loser, by Pierre Lascott

We don’t typically cover weight loss on FGG because, let’s face it, you can’t throw a Weight Watchers cookie very far without hitting a diet or weight loss web site. It’s unoriginal, it’s redundant, and in the end that stuff usually does nothing for our body image and self-esteem.

Instead, we focus on how to enjoy a fun, active, enriching and rewarding life now instead of waiting until you’ve achieved some magic, “when I’m ______” criteria. And it’s in that spirit, not the deflating spirit of “self-correction,” that I’m posting this guide. Stay with me.

I’ve seen five or six episodes of NBC’s “The Biggest Loser,” and I have markedly mixed feelings about it. On one hand it’s inspiring and the human stories are fascinating. Who wouldn’t be moved by those transformations, and by what they suggest about our own possibilities?

On the other hand, it’s disconcerting. Losing that much weight in such a short a time period isn’t healthy, the sequestered and intensive means by which they do it aren’t sustainable in the long term for most people, and the show is set up to be as melodramatic as possible. During every episode I’ve gone through bi-polar spells of disgust and intrigue.

I mentioned to a friend a month or two ago that it would be fun to take what’s great about the show, like the teamwork, the relationships and support, the mental rigor, leaving behind the drama, the backstabbing, the unhealthy obsessions – and create a small group of our own. We were in a rut, wanting to get back into shape but feeling uninspired. My friend said, “Why not?”

And that was all it took. Over the next few weeks I placed ads on Craigslist for people with at least 50 pounds to lose, set up a local web site and NING social network, got a gym to sponsor us with deeply discounted membership and other perks, and then waited until kick-off day on January 1, 2010. I crossed my fingers that at least 15 people would show up.

I walked through the gym doors that morning to a crowd of more than 30 very excited, motivated men and women ready to dig in. And dig in we have. The outpouring of support from sponsors and the gym staff has been incredible, and the group has already started bonding into friendships with a mischievous twist of healthy competitive spirit. I couldn’t be more pleased.

Many organizations have started hosting biggest loser-like competitions for employees, but if yours doesn’t, or you’re not working,

We defined group criteria
My friend and I felt that to be most able to identify with each other’s struggles and to feel most comfortable in a group, it made sense to recruit people who had a similar amount of weight to lose. We decided 50 pounds was a good number, and was doable and healthy in six months for a person committed to those goals. And we wanted committed: no wishy-washy, victim mentalities to drag down group morale allowed. Each member had to commit to attending at least one of two official monthly meetings (one of those would be a weigh-in). Those requirements, and being at least 18 years of age, were our only criteria.

We defined challenge parameters
Like the show, we wouldn’t be relying on the highest number of actual pounds lost to determine the winner, but the percentage of body weight lost. Each month the biggest loser that month will receive a sponsored prize, and the grand prize goes to the person who loses the highest percentage of body weight overall by the final weigh-in.

We also decided we’d split the group into teams to get people fired up and accountable to a group. That turned out to be a good move: as soon as we started planning team challenges, the buzz and activity in the group went WAY up. Winning teams get prizes for the whole team – like dinner out, or free haircuts from a local salon.

We set the group up to revolve mostly around two things: a NING social network and the sponsor gym, with some extra activities like hiking, bowling and healthy dinner parties set up separately.

When setting member dues, we we needed to decide if we’d charge only what the gym was charging us – $25/month per member for full access – or upcharge to cover time and administrative details. Because there were few if any other expenses associated with managing the group, and because we wanted as many people as possible to be able to participate, we chose not to charge more than the $25. That made logistics easier, too, as the gym collects payment automatically and we just need to show up.

We spread the word far and wide
We drew up flyers and left them at libraries and on post office counters, we created a basic web site and placed ads in Craigslis’s community groups section, then we emailed all our friends and family and recruited them to email theirs, too. The more the merrier, and we knew the more people we had involved, the less chance there was of the group fizzling out within the first few weeks.

We created a sponsor kit to get local businesses excited
The Biggest Loser is a national hit, and achievement against the odds for people in transformation is addicting to an audience. A local version of that combination with a well-thought-out plan and good materials was compelling to sponsors, and we’ve brought some great ones, including Subway, on board. We gave them each a sheet with the prize slots we still needed to fill, along with recommended values for each, and let them choose what best met their goals and budget.

For their sponsorship, they’ll receive a linked logo on our web site, mention in all our materials and press releases, and an invitation to each weigh-in, including theirs, where they can present their prize to the winner in person.

We got busy getting busy
Nothing is more motivating than seeing other people in action and enjoying it, and energy begets energy in a bonded group. We injected lots of energy into the initial weigh-ins and “before photos” to be sure we didn’t lose momentum during everybody’s “ugh” moments.

Then we wasted no time getting our “gym legs” – setting up small group meets, signing up for classes together, showing each other how to use this piece of equipment or play that game. The more we work out together, the more we WANT to work out together – in fact, I’ve been to the gym every day this week and have yet to not run into at least a couple of other group members while I’m there. I predict big successes for this group.

It’s now taken on a life of its own, and I’m loving it. I’ve made 30+ new friends, have new partners in crime for things I want to try but felt too self-conscious to do in the past, and have a whole team of people pulling me on, and vice versa, should the urge to give up set in. No matter who wins six months from now, in less than a week we’ve all changed course of our lives.

So if you’re looking for an engine for your own efforts to get in shape, why wait? Pick up the phone or open up a blank email, recruit a good friend to help, and get busy planning your big win. And when you get sucked in and start having a great time, too, we’d love to hear all about it.

Ready…set? GO.Similar Posts:

• Ask FGG: “Where can I find a weight rehab?”
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