The Fat Girl's Guide to Living

relaxing moment courtesy of ximenacab

Some “Ask FGG” questions apply on any day of the year. Others, like this week’s reader inquiry, seem custom-made for hot and steamy July days.

There’s a spot on my back deck that would look great with a hammock, but I don’t want to spend a lot of money on something that might not hold me. Are hammocks one size fits all? If not, where should I look?

Few objects in this world say “relaxation” more completely than hammocks — they might as well work a good book and a refreshing drink into the purchase price. For overweight women, however, hammocks tend to fall into the category of “Items We Feel Compelled to Approach With Caution,” for fear they may not support our weight. (Other objects on that list: Camping chairs. Spindle-legged chairs. Men with runners’ builds.)

Choosing a fat-girl-friendly hammock

For the kind of portable hammock that’s popular for camping or use in the space you’re describing (i.e. sets up and relocates easily onto a deck or lawn, no trees or hardware required), a weight capacity of 225-250 pounds is pretty common. Most big box stores or sporting/outdoor goods retailers seem to offer at least one comparable model, in addition to styles with more of a sling factor.

Since you’ll be giving the hammock a home on your deck and likely won’t need to move it around, you’ll do better with a stand-and-hammock combo. To ensure reliable support, choose a hammock bed with a higher weight capacity (the Island Bay XL rope hammock accommodates 450 pounds) and mount it on a heavy-duty hammock frame; even better: buy both pieces as a kit ($174.98, Hammocks.com). Unless you’re specifically shopping through a site like LivingXL or My Size USA, look for hammocks that are geared toward multiple people; the weight limit, width and often the length will be higher than your standard one-person hammock.

If you prefer your hammock bed to feel more solid beneath you than rope weave, try a fabric or quilted style, instead. Girls who like more substantial-feeling hammocks will also want to choose a design with spreader bars, which hold the hammock open to create a flat surface rather than a slack sling. On the other hand, hammocks without spreader bars (350-pound capacity with adjustable frame, $169.98) offer a more cocoon-like feeling as you sink into them — though climbing back out may prove tricky. The frame we’d buy if money were no object? The Hatteras Hammocks® Roman Arc® hammock stand (450-pound capacity, $499.95). And then we’d put it on the dreamy beach scene in the photo and we’d swing on that puppy.

Installing your hammock securely

Whatever design you choose, be sure to buy a frame that’s compatible (some frames won’t accommodate hammocks with spreader bars), as well as any additional hardware your specific model indicates. Once installed, unoccupied hammocks without spreader bars should hang parallel to the ground without sagging. The hammock will sink once your weight is in it, but shouldn’t sag much — if at all — before that point. Detach and stretch the hammock tighter if necessary.

Readers who’ve had one eye sizing up the backyard trees as they read this post (13-16 feet apart is ideal) should keep in mind that they’ll need hardware secure enough to bear the same weight as their hammocks. Using hardware is preferable to tying rope around the trees for permanent installations because rope can be more harmful to trees in the long run. For temporary hammock placement, such as while on vacation, try easy-to-use tree straps.

Once everything is securely fastened, it’s time to take your new toy for a test swing, taking care to keep your weight evenly distributed (especially as you climb in) so the hammock doesn’t flip. All that’s left to do now is sway (okay, nap) for hours on end without a care. Isn’t summer grand?

Speaking of relaxing naps: I’m off to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine on the beach of Lake Huron. Look for fabulous posts by Toni & Tee while I’m gone, and I’ll see you all in August!

We’re curious: Do you prefer a flatter hammock bed or one that cocoons you? And what setup (frame, trees, portable) has worked best for your hammocking needs? Tell us in the comments.

The mission: To blend in here (image by YoTut)

One of the best parts of receiving FGG reader mail is that it gives us a glimpse into how diverse your lives and interests are. In recent weeks, we’ve fielded questions on everything from cycling to sundresses to tennis clothes. And this week it’s all about Vegas, baby!

I have a bachelorette party coming up for my good friend, and it is going to be at Wet Republic at MGM Grand in Las Vegas. I have nothing but thinner friends who can walk around in bikinis and heels . . . . I’m a size 16 and I can’t seem to find a suit and a cover-up that makes me feel sexy like my friends look in their bikinis. Any tips on where to shop? I want to look stylish and be comfortable in a [swim]suit in a public place like that.

Before launching into shopping suggestions, let’s take a moment to acknowledge your decision to attend the bachelorette party with your friends, despite the concerns you’re having. Publicly wearing a swimsuit as an overweight woman can be enough of a mental challenge even before factoring in the club vibe of Wet Republic. Your decision not to let your weight dictate whether you attend, but rather to seek a way to rock your own killer curves at the celebration is what FGG is all about. Good for you, girl!

Sexy full-figured swimwear

Now the fun part: shopping! If you haven’t already read through our recent Guide to Figure-Flattering Swimwear, it’s a great place to begin getting ideas for fun, trendy swimwear in plus sizes (including some sexy swim dress looks). We also recently answered another reader’s question about plus-size sarongs.

Both posts offer a mixed bag of finds, both practical and sexy. With your specific goal of blending into bikini-land in mind, what about a one-shoulder design from Monif C.? The single-shoulder look is hot this season, and the suit still provides plenty of coverage, as well as the option to show more or less leg, depending on your mood. (For more secure bust support, you can add the optional second shoulder strap.)

For a bikini-like feel with more stomach coverage, check out the plus-size offerings from Bikini Sunshine. Their two-piece suits are ordered as separates, so you can mix and match for the best size combination of top (cup sizes A/B through DDD) and bottom (sizes up to 18). We were drawn to both the black matte and purple babydoll tankini styles, in particular.

FGG editorial also admits to an ongoing love affair with the suits from Pinup Girl Clothing. Several of their styles come in plus sizes (up to size 20) and they’re bold, colorful and sexy in ways that celebrate the curves not all bikini bods can boast. Frankly, should you opt for the new vintage-inspired sheath suit (in red, black or gold), it wouldn’t shock us if your bikini-clad friends envied you.

Choosing a stylish cover-up to match

The cover-up you reach for will likely depend on the cut of your suit, but there’s just enough flounce and movement in this bandeau, waterfall-style design (sizes 1X-3X, Always For Me) to help you feel sexy without being over-exposed. If that’s not your style, the same site offers plenty of other options, including flirty skirts with tummy control (1X-3X) to babydoll dresses in multiple colors (2X-3X). Or, you could go for sexy and simple by pairing a georgette sarong (1X-2X, Swimsuits Just For Us) with the Rio De Janeiro Twist Bandeau suit from Always For Me. Available in four colors and sizes ranging from 16W-26W, this gorgeous, curve-hugging suit is just begging for a trip to Vegas.

Whatever look you choose, be sure to read Peony’s thoughts on swimsuit socializing before hitting the pool, and remember that confidence is the sexiest accessory of all. Have fun and keep us posted!

Ladies: What fat-girl phobias have you conquered so far this summer? Tell us about the activity or social gathering you braved — or suggest another great pool-party fashion for this reader.

Padded bike shorts protect you where it counts. (Image by L. Marie)

Summer is prime cycling time, so it seems only fitting that FGG’s very own Tee posed this week’s question in the comments of a recent Guide:

I’ve got an Ask FGG question of my own. Are there any padded plus-size bike shorts? I’m taking a spinning class that hurts my rear end, and I can’t seem to find those.

It’s ironic, isn’t it? Despite the padding many of us carry in that area, it often still hurts like crazy to sit on a bike and pedal. I’ll be honest — when I saw this question, I fully expected the answer to be “nope!” But it turns out my inner skeptic was only half right; padded shorts do exist in extended sizes (thanks, athletic apparel manufacturers!), but you shouldn’t expect to find the pads in the buttocks of your shorts.

The primary functions of chamois padding in bike shorts are 1) to wick moisture away from the body and 2) to provide a buffer between seams and stitching and your skin, thereby protecting delicate body parts and minimizing chafing. For this reason, the placement of the pad runs from the crotch area back through the tailbone — in short, the shape of the pad mirrors that of an extended bike seat.

Designed for women by women, the Shebeest Triple S Shorts ($80) are available in plus sizes 1X-3X. In addition to offering extended sizes, Shebeest equips these shorts with SheLastic^TM Chamois Plus pads, which are customized to accommodate the size and pressure of a bigger biker. The company’s Pedal Pusher Tights are also offered in the same sizes, with the same padding.

For a less expensive ($44.95), more colorful ride, Aero Tech Designs offers women’s Pro Bike Shorts in sizes 3X (22/24) and 4X (26/28) and in five different colors. Aero Tech’s sizable catalog of plus-size cycling gear includes triathlon shorts, a wrap-around skirt and jerseys. But for our money, the  maximum padding comes in the form of Aero Tech’s thick-padded Century Short, designed with extra “butt pillow” (sold!) cushioning for long-distance bike rides.

Whether you’re planning a leisurely ride along the bike path or on sweating through a spinning class, be sure to follow the accompanying care instructions on your new pair of padded shorts to ensure maximum garment life and moisture-wicking properties. And check out our Guide to Cycling for tips on finding a comfy seat and ride. Happy riding!

Any cyclists or spinners in the readership? How do you stay comfortable in the saddle during long rides?

image by sopues

We love hearing from our FGG readers. You girls help keep us tuned in to the questions and issues that are real and relevant in your diverse lives right now. This week’s reader question is a great example:

“Hello! I love to go snorkeling, jet skiing, etc., but find my time in the sun causes more than the occasional sunburn. I’d like to get one of those rash guard shirts that offer sun protection, but can’t seem to find one to fit me. I wear a size 20-22 top and I know they’re supposed to be slim fitting, but I end up looking like an over-stuffed sausage! Have you guys had any experience finding any in plus sizes?”

Worn during all types of watersports from surfing to kayaking, or just while swimming, rash guard athletic shirts (so named because they protect the skin while sliding on and off a surfboard) are made of spandex and nylon or polyester. In addition to providing protection from UV rays (shirts are given UPF ratings, similar to the SPF ratings seen on sunscreens), these shirts can be worn snugly over a swimsuit or layered under a wetsuit to minimize skin chafing.

The ideal fit is close against the body without making anyone resemble breakfast meats. Choosing a plus-size rash guard with the correct fit is important because UPF drops as a shirt stretches and the material thins out over your skin. The largest selection of extended sizes comes from Solartex Sun Gear, which offers women’s rash guard shirts in sizes as large as 5XL, which fits 52″-54″ chests. In addition to short-sleeve and long-sleeve shirts, Solartex also sells plus-size, unisex rash guard shorts, tights and loose-fitting swim shirts (up to size 6X), as well as a ladies’ rash guard swimsuit.

For a less pricey alternative (approximately $20 cheaper than the Solartex shirts), consider a short- or long-sleeved Lands’ End AquaTerra™ rash guard if you can comfortably wear sizes 1X-3X (16W/18W – 24W/26W). We like Junonia’s sporty, color-blocked rash guard with a zip-front style, but as of this writing every single size and color combination is on backorder.

Finally, the least expensive rash guard we found was from SunGrubbies.com: The short-sleeve version costs just $29.95 and is available in sizes up to 4X, which claims to provide “skin-tight” fit on women weighing 230-250 pounds, or a looser, “t-shirt fit” that’s comparable to a ladies’ 2X. Our only issue? A 5’2 woman weighing 250 pounds is likely to carry her weight much differently than a 5’11 woman of the same weight. Using weight as a sizing guideline sometimes makes things more confusing when the intent is to be clear.

Rash guards and swim shirts are gaining popularity, especially for their sun protection properties. Are you a fan? Tell us which brand and fit you prefer, and share your experiences about sizing in the comments.

The challenge: fitting a bra under this adorable dress (image via SWAKdesigns.com)

Hi, FGG! I love the comfort and ease of sundresses, but they always leave me feeling over-exposed in the bust. Do bra-friendly sundresses exist? I can’t spend the summer in sleeves!

Lightweight, airy and relatively inexpensive, sundresses are pure summertime comfort and can provide welcome relief from the heat. Equally appealing is the garment’s versatility, which makes it a great choice for a anything from running errands with the kids to meeting friends for brunch or drinks. But what happens when a full-figured woman has too much up top to feel comfortable with strappy, sometimes minimal coverage across her bust? Fortunately, no one needs to sweat all summer in sleeves if she doesn’t want to! Check out some of the styles we located and see if you don’t feel cool breezes hitting you already.

Wide-strap sundresses

Being a busty girl myself, I often find myself spending a summertime morning commute coveting the spaghetti-strap dresses worn by those around me. Unfortunately, wispy little dress ties don’t mesh well with the substantial, inch-wide bra straps required to secure my boobs — and those of many a well-endowed reader. While it’s sometimes a little trickier to find cute sundresses that incorporate wider straps without looking frumpy, the volume of plus-size offerings this season is impressive. From wrap-style tops to simple V-necks to straight-across necklines with tank straps, most retailers like Avenue, Ashley Stewart, JCPenney and Old Navy (plus sizes online only) include a handful of thicker-strapped options in their summer lines.

Finding the right bustline coverage

Wide straps don’t always provide a flattering fit on their own. Unless you’re planning to do some bra shopping, make sure you pick dresses that will fit your chest in a flattering way and mesh well with the bra silhouettes you prefer to wear. For example, if you have a drawer stuffed with full-coverage bras with teardrop-shaped cups, a boxy dress neckline probably won’t be a good fit. Instead, try a dress style with higher, fuller coverage on top (or pair the straight-across neckline with a balconette bra). Dresses with deep V-necks may require a plunge bra. And don’t forget to check the view from the back to make sure you’re covered, and choose a bra color that works with your dress whenever possible (i.e. don’t wear a red bra under a green dress unless you want it to be seen. Trust me.)

Beyond bra style, consider the shape and characteristics of your chest; a large bust does not always equal bodice-filling cleavage, something I can sadly verify from experience. Despite year after year of disappointing fitting room adventures, I refuse to learn my lesson and remain hopelessly obsessed with deeply V-necked wrap styles. Where scores of other women with my measurements would look like knockouts in the same dress, plunging vees like these only emphasize the separation between my boobs (not to mention their stubborn adherence to this thing called “gravity”). All in all, not the best look for me; I’ve learned that a scooped neckline like this one creates more natural-looking cleavage. But if you’re built like me and crave the vee, take heart–we just need an equally cute dress with a neckline that lands a little higher on our chest–Done.

Finally, if you’re still dying to wear a spaghetti-strap, halter or tube-style dress (Torrid has several, as does Old Navy), maybe now is the right time to experiment with strapless or convertible bras. Check out last week’s “Ask FGG” for suggestions on how to lose (or rearrange) the bra straps without compromising on support. Or if you simply must wear your favorite bra or feel too exposed in traditional sundresses, this recent Ask FGG on adding sleeves to summer dresses might help. Honestly, it’s a good thing I’m broke and cut off from shopping, or I’d be digging out the old, ill-fitting strapless bra to wear under this Lane Bryant tie-front dress. Will someone please order this dress in Andorra brown and give it a good home and the diva curves it deserves? Thanks in advance, readers!

Learn more about dressing to flatter a larger chest, or share your favorite sundress finds in the comments.

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Psst! Have you given the FGG team your two cents yet for a chance to win a $20 Walmart gift card? More here.

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Lessons learned: You don’t need to cook with edible flowers to call yourself a foodie

Fact: To be a fat girl of any shape or size, for any portion of your life, is to have some kind of a love/hate relationship with food. Sometimes the conflict is as benign as a lighthearted “Why can’t french fries have the same nutritional value as spinach?” For many of us, the relationship with food (food as friend, food as love, food as boredom deterrent, food as source of guilt, etc.) is a complicated one that we’re still seeking to unravel or make peace with. And yet. . . food is an undeniable, often enjoyable, part of our lives. We deserve the chance to embrace cooking, or fine dining, or trying new foods if that’s our passion.

Fueled by this idea, as well my own recent stint playing foodie-for-a-day (truly a marvel when you understand I don’t like foods that touch), I wanted to explore the concept of fat girl as foodie. With the shame that overweight women sometimes feel about food — or a habit of eating repetitive meals, or eating in secret — can the two coexist? Since I’m the farthest thing from an expert on the matter, I enlisted help from a source who knows her foodstuffs and the kind of tips our FGG readers want to hear — our very own Foodie Friday blogger, Michelle Laffler! Michelle patiently addressed each of my neophyte questions, and the result is a must-read for any plus-sized girl who wants to relish her meals without guilt.

What does it mean to be a “foodie”?

Might as well start with the basics, right? I don’t know about you, but when I hear the term “foodie,” it calls to mind meals/foods/ingredients that are non-mainstream, indulgent, rich, expensive, exotic, complicated, or difficult to prepare/use. It also makes me assume a self-proclaimed foodie will judge me for occasionally loving the Olive Garden. So how about it, Michelle? Where am I right, where am I wrong, and what am I missing?

ML: I don’t see the term “foodie” as being nearly so limited. Sure, there are people in the world who believe that unless you’re cooking with exotic, high-priced ingredients and preparing them in unconventional ways you’re not truly a “foodie,” but I beg to differ. I think if you take joy in food — whether by preparing it, eating it, or both — you’re at least a little bit of a foodie.  And don’t worry — most of us aren’t judging you… we’re wondering if we can grab a seat at your table! (P.S. We all have our food-related vices. You may remember that I wrote recently about my love for boneless wings from Buffalo Wild Wings, which are culinary brilliance to me but maybe not so much to someone else.)

Dealing with the stigma of overweight women and food

For some of us, the idea of openly embracing our desire to create, learn about and love food is deeply terrifying. As an example of how we sometimes internalize the stigma — and how painful and challenging the subject of food can be — one friend shared with me that she feels like “fat girls shouldn’t talk about food — because we shouldn’t draw attention to ourselves in that way. We shouldn’t love food because that’s how we got fat.”

So I asked Michelle, an overweight woman who’s blogged about food for over two years, whether she’s ever felt judged because of her weight. Did she feel the urge to “apologize” for her love of food, and how has she dealt with that, both in her own mind and through actions and attitude?

ML: I think I’m more prone to judge myself and worry what other people are thinking than to actually be judged. Coming to terms with that nagging little voice in our heads is often a big step for curvy girls, and no doubt many of us have wondered what the people around the table were thinking as we ordered that piece of chocolate cake for dessert. I’d be lying if I said I never gave it a second thought, even after many years of self-discovery and lots of work toward self-acceptance.

However, I also know that I love a great salad just as much as I love a good slice of pie and that food, just like so many other things in life, is about balance and moderation, not denial. Sure, the voice is still there at times, but when I look around the table at my dear friends or family, I realize they love me just the way I am and there’s no need whatsoever for me to feel bad or apologize for a little bit of indulgence. If it happens that I feel like I’ve overdone it at some point during the day, I find that just a little bit of moderate or brisk activity (even if it’s just cleaning the house at warp speed while dancing to 80′s rock) goes a long way toward putting those feelings out of my head.

Can I be health-conscious AND be a foodie?

What are some good tips for for girls who want to be more adventurous food-wise, but also seek a balanced, healthy lifestyle? In discussing this Guide, another friend said, “I’d assume that weight loss and foodism are mutually exclusive.” Is she wrong? Can we have both if we want them?

ML: Can we have it all? You bet! Like I said, balance and moderation is what makes it all work. There are so many great-tasting, fun foods to be experienced and there’s absolutely no reason anyone should deprive themselves of that adventure. If closing your eyes and just pointing at something on the menu makes you too nervous or you’re not sure whether you’ll like something, seek out the advice of a friend with similar food tastes or from the wait staff at your favorite restaurant. Don’t be afraid to try new things, but don’t feel as though you have to go all out, either (I’ve been working on my taste for sushi for about five years now, but I started out with a California Roll – which isn’t really acknowledged as “sushi” by sushi snobs). And if you choose to order something on the more indulgent side of things, don’t think you have sabotage your waistline and eat it all in the same sitting. Split that chicken cordon bleu with a friend or take half home with you.

What are some good resources for a foodie newbie?

We’ve already established that I’m culinarily challenged. (And now we’ve established that I just made up the word “culinarily.”) Despite my ability to get sucked into food-related reality programming like “Chopped” or “Ace of Cakes” (and let’s not even discuss how happy a “Food Network Challenge” marathon makes me), I never find myself drawn to the kind of programs that would provide entry-level, real-world skills. (That would make too much sense, right?) In that spirit, I asked Michelle for some of her go-to resources — blogs, books, television shows, magazines, people — for solid, accessible culinary advice and trends for beginners.

ML: Here’s my confession: I’m a Food Network junkie. There are so many styles and skill levels represented among the Food Network chefs that there’s almost always something inspiring to be found there (I have personal soft spots for Rachael Ray and Paula Deen). The Food Network website includes difficulty levels and user reviews — both of which I find really valuable — and the Food Network Magazine brings that same great mix to print.

A few of my favorite food blogs from my overflowing blog reader are A Southern Grace (amazing recipes with fun, honest commentary), 101 Cookbooks (you’ve never seen natural, healthy food look so good), The Perfect Pantry (I’ve built a lot of knowledge about the items in my pantry thanks to Lydia), and Smitten Kitchen (danger: do not read while hungry!).

I’m a picky eater, but I want to learn about food

For some of us, trying new things doesn’t come easy. I was nearly laughed off Facebook recently when I shared that I’d be writing a restaurant review (“Do they serve peanut butter sandwiches and plain pasta?”), but the experience helped me realize that I enjoy more foods than I’m usually willing to try. So, on behalf of the non-adventurous eaters — and the currently hopeless cooks — among us, I asked Michelle for a few ideas about taking baby steps to broaden our horizons and skills.

ML: If you’re feeling skeptical about stretching your food boundaries, baby steps really can be huge. I think whether you’re cooking or you’re eating, if you choose a food or technique that has a similar element or ingredient to something you’re already familiar with it’s easier to make that leap of faith and begin gaining some foodie confidence.

When it’s time to get into the kitchen, seek out recipes from trusted friends or family or on websites that feature user reviews so that you can see what other people are saying about the recipe and the techniques, etc. Read the recipe all the way through (twice) before you even enter the kitchen. Measure out and stage your ingredients ahead of time if you’re not adept at doing all of that while also reading the next step in the cookbook and stirring something on the stove. Most importantly, though, go easy on yourself. Don’t feel as though you’re obligated to love (or to be good at) everything. Find your strengths and develop them into one or two “signature” dishes. . . once you’re confident about those, you’ll be much more inclined to keep pushing your food boundaries!

Stocking your kitchen: the basics

If you’re looking to build your confidence in the kitchen, check out Michelle’s list of five kitchen basics (tools or ingredients) she can’t live without:

Three food basics:

1. good chicken stock — Can be used to make a gravy, give extra flavor to veggies, and to make lower-cal but still wonderfully tasty mashed potatoes.
2. unsalted butter — I much prefer baking with butter to baking with margarine.
3. boneless-skinless chicken breasts — I keep about 6-10 pounds of diced, cooked chicken breast pieces which have been portioned out into four ounce servings in the freezer – perfect for grabbing for weekday lunches or for putting into pastas, salads, or stir-fry dishes after a quick trip through the microwave.

Two kitchen tool staples:

1. a good chef’s knife — Food prep is so much easier when you’re working with a decent knife that feels good in your hand. [FGG note: Try Rachael Ray's versatile 6" Santoku knife, which has a good grip and is easy to use even for beginners.]
2. a decent-quality blender — Crushes ice for slushy summer drinks, but also handy for blending soups, pasta sauces, etc.

One final thought from FGG: Whatever your current relationship with food, and whether you’re a kitchen newbie or a plus-sized girl with the most refined palate in town, hold your head high the next time you order a meal or step into a grocery store. One of the most important steps toward leading a full, rich, unapologetic life is to be intentional and fully present in every decision — including what we choose to eat. By giving real thought and consideration to the food we eat (be it healthy or indulgent), we prove that food doesn’t define us or rule us. It’s just one (delicious) part of our daily lives.

Huge, chocolate-covered thanks to Michelle for making this guide possible! For more of Michelle’s foodie wisdom (plus gorgeous photos and a wealth of recipes you can actually complete!), follow her journey at Culinography. And don’t forget to visit FGG each Friday for a brand new recipe from Michelle!

Readers, we’d love to hear your thoughts on curvy girls and food. How have you worked to reconcile food and weight? What challenges or questions do you still have? And what’s YOUR best in-the-kitchen tip you want to shout about from the rooftops (or the blog comments)?

Sleeves or No Sleeves? That is the question.
(image and dress courtesy of Stefanie Bezaire)

We love reader mail. Hearing what works – and what doesn’t – here at FGG inspires us to provide the most useful and (hopefully) engaging content possible. Here’s a recent reader email requesting a summer fashion fix for girls who are self-conscious about their upper arms:

I have a question and am wondering if you or any of your other readers might have some answers. I have recently discovered my love for dresses! Unfortunately, so many of the cutest styles are sleeveless, and i hate my upper arms! I’m wondering if there’s an easy way to add or lengthen sleeves, even/especially if the dress is made with a print fabric. Thanks again for such a great blog. I’ve found such great advice and tips and just feel happy every time there’s a new post.

Boy, can we relate to this issue! Of course, the first thing we’ll say is to encourage you to embrace your arms, flaws and all. It might be that you haven’t found the right dress with the right cap sleeve, wide strap, or cute neckline that places the focus on your whole cute package instead of one perceived flaw. But when it comes to more practical, DIY solutions to this issue, we turned to an expert to tackle this question: Stefanie Bezaire, a Toronto designer specializing in fashion for sizes 12 and up.

I totally understand where you are coming from–I hate my upper arms too! But over the years, I have found a few things that work for me.

The easiest, non- sew solutions would be:

1. Getting a super cute stretch body suit or body-hugging stretch tee with 3/4 length or short sleeves, preferably in something current and edgy. (FGG: we found several plus-size bodysuits here). Lace is so in right now and would look great under solid colors and/or prints. With a print dress you can get a bit creative and do an ’80s vibe with a denim vest and colored leggings too. The key with prints is to stick to plain colored lace–black, white or grey only. Otherwise the prints and the lace will compete and there will stares (sadly for the wrong reasons).

2. Get a lightweight shrug, cardigan, or even a button front shirt (roll up the sleeves and tie it at the waist and you’re done!). For summer dresses, look for something lightweight but not too fancy, like a jersey knit or lightweight faded denim also known as chambray (so popular right now and very accessible).

3. Draw the eyes away from the arms by adding some bold accessories. A great hair bow or headband, an elegant brooch, some fab earrings, a wide waist belt–all these things will distract from your trouble areas and highlight your assets.

4. Find a professional to help you out. When you really want to make a dress work and you have the money to pay for something custom, go for it! There are many designers who will be open to helping you find the right solution for your garment. They will most likely make sure the dress fits properly too by adjusting the hem or bust line, etc.

For the more advanced fashionista, I have some sewing solutions.

1. The simplest sewing fix would be to buy a wide trim, gather it on one side and attach to the straps (you usually will need at least double the length of the armhole to create some nice fullness). Lace again would be good, or even an eyelet fabric. Keep the trim you use in line with the style of the dress and you can’t go wrong; for example, if the dress is a simple cotton don’t go adding metallic lace. Also, try to get something the same color as the dress. Don’t go crazy with contrasts as this will only draw the eye to the arms instead of away from it.

2. If you want a sleeker, more complex option, you can always buy a dress pattern with sleeves, cut out only the sleeve pieces from the pattern and carefully attach them to your dress. A general rule to determine the right size is to measure the armhole length on the dress and add 1″- 1.5″ for ease. Compare that measurement to the one on the pattern, and if they match up you are all set! You can always use a little ribbon trim to cover up trouble spots or add length where needed.

3. When adding sleeves just won’t work, and you can’t find anything at a store that you like or that fits, don’t forget that you can also make your own lace body suit, shrug or cardigan as suggested in the non-sew tips. This is definitely a longer process, but there are some great patterns out there that are easy, affordable, and will give you exactly what you are looking for.

If you are a beginner to sewing don’t fret! There are many YouTube videos and perhaps some sewing classes in your area that can help you get started. Finally, my best tip would be to have confidence and love what you are wearing. If you walk tall, everyone will be looking at that beautiful smile on your face and not even noticing your arms!

Stefanie, thanks for sharing all of these great ideas! Girls, do you have any solutions for our reader on adding sleeves to sundresses or other clever cover-up solutions? Tell us about them in the comments.